...breaking news...HCACC Constitution found...

Apparently it does exist..the President failed to burn all copies..

All Hong Sao Shi Zi Tou's are on Michael

Sometimes whilst out and about around this great nation, one stumbles upon something that, for some reason, invokes a little smile.

He kept this quiet

Unsure quite what to do with this photo, or even why it contains humour, I submit it as part of our erstwhile caption competition.


I'll kick us off with the somewhat clunky:

"All Hong Sao Shi Zi Tou's are on Michael"

Russell Regime Diktat #0002

JC, he say OMG

The Holy Democratic Committee of the New Way for the Cricketing Crossers would like to thank all of the Great & Fit Men who attended Winter Nets on Saturday. Our newly installed covert iris recognition system calculated 24 (twenty four) able men in attendance. This required the complete facilitation of the facilities, or in other words, the use of all 4 (four) available nets.

This remarkable achievement is believed to be the first time that the use of 2 (two) nets has ever been exceeded by our venerable institution. The astonishing show of club unity is also a powerful vindication of the demanding new standards of Captain Russell.

Four Lanes

Let us pray that it is not an early pinnacle of His second coming!!!

At one point Lord Admin was overheard to mutter that there were "too many people here", but his office have since retracted this as "mis-speak" after a subsequent update of the weekly accounts showed a marked increase in revenue.

Legends in attendance at Le Galleon included the very dishonourable Coco McGogo, Jerry 'Lohan' Garcia & both Sir Shanton John AND his new bride Dame Bimbo Furnish.

There are now only 2 (two) nets remaining this pre-season on the next two Saturday's, 17th & 24th March.

The Russell Regime hereby urges a note of caution. We cannot get carried away with this amazingness and must ensure that a high attendance is maintained. See you next Saturday, normal rules apply.

Hacking Inquiry Latest

Alleged hacking

Polis are to investigate hacking allegations made against an unnamed Holy Cross wicketkeeper this website understands. Although rumours of his hacking have circulated in the East League for many years, damning new evidence emerged late on Monday evening.

Followers of a tory leadership hopeful’s Facebook page were shocked when photos of the hacking actually taking place were posted.

Far from distancing themselves from the hacker, it seems that hacking has been prevalent throughout Holy Cross CC for a number of years. An unnamed player said “yeah, we hack all the time, usually we don’t even realise we’re doing it”.

The Polis released a statement on Tuesday morning saying “We can assure members of the public that we have investigated this matter thoroughly. A fully resourced team of senior detectives scrutinised the photo’s with help from experts from the FBI. We can categorically state that this photo shows a text book cover drive and there is nothing more to see here, move along or I’ll taser you, swab your DNA and sell your details to the press.”

The Club President was unavailable for comment having recently suffered a minor automobile accident in Buenos Aires here.

Cross Twitter

To coincide with its 5th anniversary Holy Cross are now on Twitter at :

http://twitter.com/HXCricket

This ought to prove useful during the season for keeping track of scores etc.

should you wish to contribute to the feed, leave a comment here or email me-and I'll give you the log-in details.

From The Archives: HX vs BAF!

[from KF]

Joining the erstwhile glance back at HX games from yesteryear, can there be a much more priceless gem in the archives than this, extracted from the scrapbook of B Fraser?

The year was 1992. The venue was Arboretum. It was a Sunday in May. The visitors were a strong Penicuik XI. The ten man home side contained the evergreen Coco McGill and the everwilting Doogs Russell. Those lucky enough to be present were about to witness an astonishing 3 over burst of bowling.

Penicuik made a formidable 235-3 including 75 from WI pro, Phil Johnson. In reply, the Cross batsmen struggled to make good with the chase. The tail, including McGill at 6 and D Russell at 10, were ripped to shreds when 16 year old Brian Fraser announced his arrival as one-to-watch with figures of 4-15.

That batting card:

PCC

A Penman st Russell b McGill 74

D Keay b Conn 22

P Johnson lbw b Mitchell 75

M Marshall no 34

M Yan Hip no 3

R Waites, A Law, S Dagless, ex 24

B Fraser, M Allen, G Leslie DNB. 235-3

HX

I Mitchell st Law b Keay 31

F Suttie c Keay b Marshall 6

C Neil st Law b Allen 7

A Robb c Law b Allen 0

C McGill c Law b Fraser 20

D Vettese c Johnson b Fraser 3

R Litster st Law b Fraser 7

N Dingwall c&b b Leslie 0

A Conn b Fraser 0

D Russell no 3

Ex 3

80

There is no truth in the rumour that McGill has subsequently adapted his bowling style to mimic the (then) youngster's action. And, when Brian got hold of The Scotsman the next day to see his name in print, it was reported thus; B Fraser 4-115. Last night B Fraser was heard to mutter “f***** h***, if they’d had eleven I could have had a five-for."