Handbags

It's a cause of ongoing bemusement when non-cricketers come up with that old 'its a gentlemans game' chestnut. In my experience contests epitomised by sporting behaviour and gentlemanly conduct are rare enough to warrant a special mention in match reports whilst the more regular incidents of 'bad behaviour' (or should that be perceived bad behaviour) are swiftly expunged from public view by Lord Admin's lawyers on a Sunday morning.

Was it just five days ago that the virtuous upholders of sporting integrity, the Australian cricketing public, were so worked up by a cheating Englishman, Mr Stuarty Broady, the man who once edged it and didn't walk - OMG strike him down before we're all infected - that they booed his every public appearance and in some publications even refused to print his name. Before those boo's could even die down, their skipper is fined for making a "sick taunt" (quote from the Daily Mail). For some reason belittling England with the game of cricket alone wasn't enough for the 'bantering' Clarke. To quote our great Prime Minister 'calm down dear'.

With the kids down under embroiled in a full-on game of handbags, it made me think of some of the greats of the past and how to really noise up the oppo.

The current tourists predicament brings to mind that of the 1974/5 touring side who sent an SOS to the 41 year old Colin Cowdrey. Two days after arriving he walked out to an ovation at the WACA. "How good to meet you" he said to Jeff Thomson who replied "That's not going to help you fatso, piss off".

Rewind to 1954 as the young Cowdrey prepared to disembark on his first Ashes tour. Frank Tyson saw "a spare stooped old man, dressed immaculately in a pin-stripe suit" telling Cowdrey "When you reach Australia, just remember one thing - Hate the Bastards!!!"  He spoke with such vehemence that Tyson asked George Duckworth who the old gent was, "That was Douglas Jardine".

Both sides as bad as each other?

The wisdom in these situations of course is if you can't take it, don't dish it. In 2003 Australia's favourite metronomic wicket taker lost the plot in spectacular fashion playing the Windies in Antigua. Setting the tone for misbehaving cricketers nicely, Shane Warne missed this one after failing a drugs test, reportedly taking a pill his Ma had given him to help with his appearance (source - the internet)!!!!

As the hosts chased down 418 in the 4th innings for victory, McGrath began utilising the breadth of his intellect to try and unsettle Sarwan. After a few overs of concerted hatred including repeated use of the word 'pussy', a bog standard retort provoked McGrath into a fit of rage ""If you ever f*****g mention my wife again I'll f*****g rip your f*****g throat out!".  Oooh-err. Chuckle at McGrath's precociousness as he bleats to the umpire about how wronged he has been with this now classic passage of footage.

Vik takes aim at Bonfield after another fraught  net session

Talking of Aussie fast bowlers, it hardly gets much better than Lillee v Miandad.

"Hello my goodness" exclaimed Tony Greig as Miandad retaliated with his cudgel after Lillee kicked out. Botham said later of the two notorious cricketing rascals "what happened at Perth was going to happen somewhere".

Almost makes one all nostalgic for those long past East League encounters with the likes of Cramond, Fauldhouse, Heriots 2's, Stew/Mel 2's, Accies...

PS: I don't think Call me Dave is very great at all.

Cup Final Pics

I've finally got round to getting the wife to plug the phone wire into the computer so I could download photos from our glorious slaying of National League crack outfit, Fauldhouse Victoria.

We pick up the action near the end with The Almighty Quinn smoting the cream of the opposition attack to all corners of the square!!!

Quinn proving he's not all wanton aggression as he displays the gamut of his repertoire.

Bonfire now and still no way through for FVCC. That's Arthur's Seat in the background. Was once three times the height it is now doncha know!!!

Meanwhile, the excitement beyond the rope is palpable. (rough order; Roshan, Bates, McGill, Michelle, E.C., Flynn, Maddog, Cydzk, CJE, Pope.)

Have some of that!!! A rare opportunity with the plank allows Bonfire to seal cup glory and spark scenes of unbridled joy down Arboretum way.

Trewartha masks his disappointment at missing out on another ton with the knowledge there's one more winners medal for the old trophy cabinet. Can't be far behind McGill now.

Cricket, the gentleman's game. No matter what happens on the field, win, lose, draw or abandoned, it's always handshakes and pleasantries as the teams leave the field!!!

Retro Skipper Dougie Russell accepts the trophy. That's not applause you can see, it was just so cold all the players were chittering uncontrollably.

Boring. Yadda yadda, something about the hosts, the oppo, the English and Bannockburn.

A fearsome mob, can this really be the greatest team in the clubs proud history?

Back Row: Fraser (crocked), Quinn, Mahzer, Roshan, Pope (wk), Cydzik, Bates, Ellis
Front Row: Trewartha, E.C. Smith, D Russell (c), Bonfield.

The Cup safely in the grasp of Cross Cup Final veteran and Man of the Match, Mr Shannon Bonfield.

Rain reigns at Arbo as commonsense prevails in President's Trophy Final

It was a clash of the Division 1 Titans as 1st played 2nd in the end of term President's Trophy.

A coin toss went the way of the Cross and home advantage of hosting the tie at Fortress Arbo was awarded.

Rain overnight had left the square soft underfoot and as the Captain's went out to toss, it was clear that conditions above and below were likely to play a heavy part in the outcome of the game.

Fauldhouse were out the traps fast with their opening bowlers doing some fine damage. Owais run out, KF bowled, Spickers and CJE also returning to the Portacabin early on and it was 24-4 after 12 of the allocated 40 overs.

KO for KF


EC Smith was caught on the boundary as the cold and lonely scribe and photographer went for a heat in what had become a wet and perishingly cold day.

Calum joined his sibling after the Umpire took a long and hard look at an LBW shout before the trigger went up.

Bimbo then sent words of encouragement via Twitter from his Maternity Ward shopping trip with Mrs Bimbo and the BimboBump.

118 after the 40 overs - not a great score - but with the rain continuing and the light fading, who knew what the matchplay ball from Lords could do.

Tea was a feast of hot and cold foods and once again we thank Mandy for her efforts - often taken for granted.

Back out on the oval and Fauldhouse were in combat against the Cross and the Conditions, the latter to finally be their undoing.

Shannon, fresh from picking up his Player of the Year award the night before, was in fine form, unlucky not to get off the mark with some top class deliveries.

Jumping BeJesus

Pat has an LBW shout turned down

Lynch did manage a breakthrough when Owais held on to a drive from a Fauldhouse opener however as the conditions continued to deteriorate, the Umpires consulted each other and took the players off.

The Umpires decide enough really is enough

Naturally, both Teams were keen to get their hands on the silverware on offer however with the rain continuing to fall early into the Edinburgh evening, to have carried on would have been unsafe and not in the interests of the game of amateur cricket.

The rain clearly visible as is the punter on Ferry Road with their brolly!


For me, it was a poor end to a great season at Fortress Arbo for the Cross. On a personal note, it has been a tough season of no play due to injury. But beware, the Broonster will be back in 2012!!

Can Catch, Can't Bat ...

Saturday results digest:

1sts -at Arboretum
Fauldhouse 120ao
Worsnop 4-42

Holy Cross 111ao
Cydzik 39
Sandhu 3-16

We did well to recover from 33-7 but if only we'd made a half decent start...

2nds-Roseburn
lost to Mufs 3rds by 10 wickets

Admin adds - Charlie's too kind - we couldn't bat (unlike last week) or catch (just like last week). A depleted 2nds scored far too few as the recognised batsmen were dismissed cheaply and tamely by a decent, but not terribly threatening, Murrayfield-DAFS attack. Debutant Irfan Butt hit a promising 29 and the lower middle order added some useful runs, most notably with Roshan's huge six, but 120 was unlikely to be enough unless we struck early. For the second week running Roshan and Usama opened the bowling very well but without any luck and as Darren Kidd started to get his eye in the run rate accelerated.

The last 30 or so runs came very quickly as the bowlers struggled to grip a sodden ball, but by then the die was cast as catches dropped while the ball was still dry (sorry, Smudge) had cost us dear. Thanks to MUFS for a game played in the usual good spirits and without any of the "overenthusiastic" appealing which is now so widespread.

3rds-Campbell Pk
beat Largo 4's by 10 wickets

further details to follow....

Crucial Win for Twos but 1sts Flattened by Fauldhouse

1sts
At Arbo
Fauldhouse 283-5
Z. Ali 107*, A. Wallace 72, D. Mullligan 30, D. Allan 29

Holy Cross
189ao C. Ellis 64, R. Bainbridge 42, R. McDonald 4-23
further details to follow

2nds
pvb reports:
Div 5 at the Meadows

Holy Cross 2s 155-8 (Webb and Mehta 40+) :
Accies 2s about 98 all out (Astley 4 wkts).

Impressive bowling and excellent sportsmanship from Accies. HX were held back early on - 45-4 after 20 overs. Then Accies kept on losing wickets amidst some fine shots on a lottery of a pitch. Thanks to Accies for all their preparations in ensuring we had a scoreboard and a fine tea.

3rds
beat SMRH 3rds by 10 wickets
details to follow

Fraser Flourish Can't Prevent Triple Loss for Cross

Given poor availability, 3 losses is not a major surprise - though still disappointing. 2nds were very unlucky with the infamous rain rule.

1sts
Holy Cross 141ao
D. Russell 55, R. Bainbridge 30, R. Worsnop 27.

Fauldhouse 144-3
D.J. Allan 50odd.

partial scorecard here

For the 2nd successive occasion, the 1sts failed in their attempt to beat Fauldhouse with less than 2/3rds of the 1st team. After an early collapse, Dougie and Bainbro put together a fluent partnership of 60 odd and got us back into the game. But despite Robin's efforts, the absence of our usual batting depth meant we were unable to get the near a competitive total. Hopefully availability will pick up next week and beyond.

2nds
PVB reports that:

Holy Cross probably lost to Edinburgh Accies by 0.002 of a run. Holy Cross scored 188 all out; their run rate is 4.17778. Accies scored 117-5 after 27.4 overs; their run rate is 4.17857. By multiplying the Holy Cross run rate of 4.1778 by 28 overs you get 116.98.

Is the target 117 or is it 118 if Holy Cross' score is rounded up to 117? Can you win by 0.002 of a run? Your views please!

There was no argument after the game - it was played in the most sporting manner possible. It does highlight the fact the old rule of a game counting after 24/27/30 overs of a second innings was made when we had the draw - without the draw it is a win/lose situation and unfair.

Ziggy will give his reaction at 3.17am.

3rds
Lost to Dalgety Bay by about 5 wickets - details below from Broonster.

Wins for 2nds and 3rds; Bad Loss for 1sts

Results summary-details to follow.

1sts (at Arbo)
Holy Cross 131ao
C. Ellis 70
A. McDonald 4/22

Fauldhouse 136-3
Z. Ali 66
Bainbridge 2/23

brief mention in the Evening News:
http://sport.scotsman.com/cricket/Fauldhouse-see-off-Holy-Cross.5496312.jp

2nds (At Roseburn -artificial)
Won by about 8 runs
S. Bonfield 38, A. Cydzik 36, J. Bates 23
S. Bonfield 5/14.

3rds (at Inverleith Park-Artificial)
Drummond Trinity 2nds 138-9
Holy Cross 3rds 139-8
S. Russell 38, R. Ellis 23, U. Shazad 18


very exciting match won with 1 ball to spare: with Popey hitting
the winning runs via a glorious...er...gloved nurdle to short third man.
From the few overs I saw, some good batting and running by Usama and
Ellis Snr, with the latter doing his best 'Dean Jones in the 2nd tied test' impression.
Good to see the thirds up at Arbo-though a bit dissapointing that none of their opposition
made it.

1sts and 2nds lose

Div 1
Fauldhouse 149 for 9 50 overs

Holy Cross 90 for 9 50 overs

C Ellis 40 no
D Law 10 overs 2 for 7
J Bailey 10 overs 3 for 8

Frankly not much to add from a fairly miserable day on which we conceded too many runs and then soon collapsed to 21-5-albeit against some very tight bowling on an extremely tricky wicket (just ask Dougie and Euan about the balls that dismissed them).

Only two real highpoints: several sharp stumpings from Simon and a superb fielding display from Roland; including an early contender for catch of the season, in which he deployed the 'Dannreuther magic extending arm'.

A brief mention in the Evening News:
http://sport.scotsman.com/cricket/Cricket-Sevak-and-Sands-.5299105.jp

The loss leaves us third in Div 1:

B'Muir 100
Fauldhouse 100
HX 76.67
Watsonians 75
Mufs 68.75
Glens 65
Largo 65
Accies 63.75
Heriots 30
Carlton 26.67

Our next game is at home to Heriots:
http://tinyurl.com/qp4u96


Div 5

Mufs 3rd XI 162-9
Holy Cross 2nd XI 131

More details to follow.
Remember that the Thirds play at Grange Loan on Sunday- supporters welcome.