And the Winner Was .......

For all those who couldn't make it to Awards Night on Saturday, and for all those who did make it but can't remember a thing, here is the full list of 2009 award winners.

Club Player of the Year - Charlie, with Shannon runner-up.

Clubman of the Year - Andy Graham, for his willingness to play for any team and for his three match-winning innings, but mostly for volunteering as match secretary and for doing such an excellent job of it. Runners-up Colin and Charlie.

Most League Runs - Charlie, with Scott and Euan runners-up.

Most League Wickets - Richard, with Shannon and Colin runners-up.

2nds Player of the Year - Jon, with Gerry runner-up.

3rds Players of the Year - Richard and Scott.

The Buchie Award (fastest run scorer) - Roland, who scored his League runs at a strike rate of 98.

Coastal Erosion (slowest run scorer) - Ken, who scored his at a strike rate of 25.

Quack Quack Oops (most League ducks) - A three-way tie between Mahmood, Smudger and Keith F with four each. As the only nominee brave enough to attend Awards Night, Keith is the holder of the rubber duck for the next twelve months.

The Wolrige Tankard for the player with the best spirit - Bainbro, with Dave, Scott, Smudger and Calum as runners-up. In all there were nominations for 14 different players, including one for the President "post match, but GRUMPY DURING THE GAME."

Most Improved Player - Nipun, with Bainbro and Usama runners-up.

Most Disappointing Season - A tie between Keith F and the 2nd XI.

Most Memorable Team Performance - A tie between winning the Presidents Trophy and the 2nds' game away at Heriots, recovering from 99-9 to score a winning 140-odd and which was described by Ziggy as "the most memorable half-team performance - bowlers only". In joint third came the 3rds' win away at Carlton the first time; the 2nds' vital win away at Falkland in the last game of the season; and the 1sts' home win against Murrayfield DAFS.

The WG Grace Award for the Best Older Player - Richard, with Paul and Gerry as runners-up.

Best Younger Player - A tie between Usama and Nipun, with Nawaz as runner-up.

The Most Entertaining Moment of the Season - A "senior moment" from the 3rds' first trip to Carlton this year when Ken told both Keith and Colin that they were batting at seven. With Coco, starting from the pavilion, delayed by the need to finish a fag and regale evryone who'd listen with tales of his batting prowess, Keith narrowly won the race to the wicket by approaching surreptitiously from the square leg boundary. Two balls later Colin finally got his chance. Incident now available, appropriately enough, on You Tube(s).

The Flintoff Award for the Most Heroic Individual Performance - Obviously this award should go to Dougie "Six Million Dollar Man" Russell every year for managing to play at all, let alone well, given the number of injuries he's carrying. However, this year's award went to Gerry and Zeeshan for the match-winning 10th wicket stand against Heriots for the 2nds. Runners-up, the Andies, Q and G, for their heroics at Falkland as the 2nds recovered from 15-5 to score 140-odd for 6 and avoid relegation.

Catch of the Year - Runners-up were Roland's "magic extending arm" catch vs Fauldhouse and Andy Quinn's Evening News-worthy effort vs Morton. But the run-away winner was Andy Graham for his remarkable, one-handed, full-length, diving snaffle on the boundary at Falkland to dismiss the man who was hitting us out of the game - especially as Andy seemed to be asleep when the ball was hit.

The James Bradley Memorial Princess Hissy Fit Trophy - In 2nd place, for his consistent excellence in minor on-field tantrum- and huff-throwing, involving some impressive bat-tossing and the occasional walk to Inverleith Park to calm down, the man who has described Dr Bradley as his mentor more than once - Charlie. But Ellis Jnr, who off the field is the nicest chap you're ever likely to meet (with the possible exception of Ellis Snr), is pipped by a man who, as Captain of the "most disappointing" 2nds, might have been expected to win this award by ranting and raging on the field. Instead, with the partial exception of the now infamous "effing, effing, effing" motivational speech against Carlton, he has shown the patience of a saint while in whites. Give him a Blackberry after a game, however, and, even when clearly entirely "sobber", he's the very devil. For those e-mails, the winner of the Golden Dummy is Ziggy.

Distinguished Hawaiian Shirt Wearer of the Year Award - It's that man again - Andy Graham.