"Giants" Of Holy Cross Fail To Impress

Insanity

The UK's barmy smoking restrictions almost put paid to our valiant boys hopes in the Activcity Indoor 6's at Forrester High School on Friday night. More on that in a sec.

First up we were pitted against Division One new boys Edinburgh South and retro Crosser, the Good Doctor Astley!!!

HX: S McOscar, P Kumar, A Millington, T Archer, R Bainbridge, J McOscar.

With most of our team debuting in this format and a green skipper in Si McOscar, who sloppily lost the toss, we were put in and got busy running ourselves out (3 of the 5 wickets were run outs, although Bainbro still managed to miss a devious straight one as is his way and got bowled).

We tiptoed into the 70's with the highlights being Praveen clattering the first ball he faced for 6 and a decent tap by hot new signing Jimbo McOscar. But it wasn't enough and the Good Doctor eventually saw his team home with 4 wickets down.

I arrived to witness the last rites of this defeat and proceeded to read the riot act at our underperforming slackers. I was especially harsh on the skipper for losing the toss as our tournament survival now hung by a thread. Confusion reigned supreme as Praveen appeared set to make for home before we reminded him there was still a game to come.

Before long it was Game 2 and we were on against another former HX Leg End, S Russell's East Lothian County CC (aka Tranent). Simon paid heed to my barracking and this time won the toss, opting to put the oppo in first. But wait, there were only 5 bodies left. Praveen had indeed scarpered!!! Welcome to the captaincy Si and try and keep your troops in order!!!

With complete reluctance, I safely entered the arena, jeans and all.

Praveen as game 2 kicked off

Our chuckers set about their task of spraying down some leg side wides and when we realised we weren't going to get them all out inside 8 overs, it became apparent that I might have to bowl my 2 over quota.

Praveen re-appeared at this point. Turned out he'd simply nipped outside for a cigarillo and hadn't realised we were playing again straight away. If only you could smoke in gym halls, none of this would have been an issue!!! But I wasn't for budging from the game now especially with a chance to show the throwers how to bowl.

With obvious trepidation, the skip threw me the ball. Needless to say I found some prodigious swing and couldn't even keep the ball on the mat for the first couple of deliveries. But once I adjusted the seam I soon began to terrorise the Tranentians ending on 0-19 from two overs in a cameo that everyone there will surely remember until the day they croak. These figures would have been even better if Archer hadn't dropped the first wicket in what would probably have been a match winning hat-trick as the men from the East tried to find a way to cope with my 'variety'.

They made their way to 82 which if we cut out the run outs, should have been a breeze. However, the less said about our innings the better. Lets say our ringer salvaged things. Retiring once before returning as last wicket he plundered 39 (not out) partnering extras (mid twenties) whilst the rest of us failed to make double figures. We managed to reach the target on the penultimate ball (Milly turning one round the corner for 3) keeping our slim tournament hopes alive.

The other highlight was a call from a Tranent player as we floundered mid innings "come on lads, this'll be a giant killing"!!!!

Did I mention the dropped catch off my bowling???

There is an Indoor 6's link on the ESCA website. It hasn't been updated yet but I'm sure details will appear in due course.

Finally, for all the evidence based factboys, this picture of club stalwart McGill on his third last birthday is counter proof of the actual good that pumping chemical smoke into your lungs can do.

Happy Birthday Coco, here's to the next 100